An distant memory


One of the nice things about moving house and packing, is that sometimes, you discover elements of your past self inadvertently. I discovered and old 3.5″ floppy disc the  other day while go through my drawers and true enough, its contents were a time capsule. I remember now that to help me through difficult times in university and early work stressors, I would write to vent. It’s by no coincidence that since meeting Marianne, the muse has long been lost. I can’t even vaguely remember the last time I wrote something poetic. I like to believe that my artistic expression has moved on to the visual medium of photography.

This is the poem titled “Drive By”. It was written in 1999 during which people who know me, will know the problem that created this poem.

I remember when we used to cry

Never a reason , never knew why.

You used to smile and gently stroke

The tears of ire which soured our bliss

With every phrase and heartless kiss

You fed me hope , my love to yoke

I never knew that in my peace

You’d sold your heart , another’s lease

You loved me still or so it seemed

Illusions I wish I’d never dreamed

Left me alone to play my part

But all the while we drifted apart

A rotting raft I captained in death

He stole your light, incurred my wrath.

 

It was so clear, the cold in your grasp

Each phrase  of love a forceful rasp

But I was blind and drowned by love

Fighting the swirl for the air above

And yet it seemed, all so sudden

The day they rose ,the truths so hidden

You crushed my will, my arms in leather

The air above , a distant shimmer

I’ve driven by the places we met

Swallowing down the bitter regret

I’ve walked alone the riverside walks

Throwing crumbs to the silent flocks

Cool wind blows past , my eyes sorely blind

But my memories of you ,still  burn in my mind.

 

The fire had faded, the embers still warm

When displaced I did, my intentions of harm

I hated the man I’d see as a joke

A thief of the night, stealing my hope

I could not accept , the blame was all mine

Love you or hate you, the thinnest black line

I’d placed you upon that altar of guilt

Roses around you, threatened to wilt

But around your face, they flower and live

That this was cold fate, I’ll never believe.

My thoughts were awry , a danger to you

So I’ve let you be free in all that you do

Drive by your home once in a while

Remembering your touch, the warmth in your smile

Then drive away meekly to aimlessly roam

My heart still beating without a true home.

The fire has faded , the ashes are cold

Swept and forgotten , my story now told.

—–end of sadness circa 1999——-

ok, now for something a little more cheery : an image of sunrise taken this morning from Saint Kilda Beach.

stkilda-1258

The days still pass as water flows

The ebb and tide through dusk and dawn

As grief abates and gladness glows

Tears forlorn, so far, so gone.

—-end of peace circa 2009—-

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Posted on August 22, 2009, in M&D Corner, Random Musings. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. nice words
    nice shot

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